The answer to your question, “What the hell is wrong with [me]?” is that I’m flawed, human. Thankfully that obvious and inescapable fact no longer plagues me as it once did. It used to be such a burden, trying to appear just so, to wear the masks of got-it-togetherness, brilliance, wit, savvy. I never felt known when I wore those masks. No wonder. But after I began to know Jesus, to spend time in the Bible and recognize love there, I eventually accepted it. Love, that is. When I accepted the love God has for me, the burdens of shame and guilt I had carried around no longer pressed on me. I wasn’t even ashamed that I hit your car. I was bummed, certainly, and sorry, especially given the fact that it was a brand new VW Beetle. There was a time when a shiny (oh so shiny) new VW bug would have made me a raving lunatic too. And I’ll even confess, there was a time when I would have feigned injury for some free chiropractor appointments and a big, fat settlement check. But those are what the hell WAS wrong with me, and you asked what the hell is wrong with me now. Ok, though God and I are like this: picture my crossed fingers– I still mess up sometimes. Like right after I bumped you I said an unlovely word in the presence of my two boys. And I smacked my dog. Once. Some people are 65% water; I’m 65% sarcasm. I could go on… But I try to love like God loves, to admit when I’m wrong, and live at peace with all men. Which is why, after bumping you ever-so-slightly, I got out of my car to apologize and exchange insurance information. I’d have gotten more than “ssssss–” out of my mouth if you hadn’t cut me off with your “question.” My heart hurts when I think of it. But I’m asking God to help me move beyond my own hurt feelings, to yours, since you clearly expect the world is full of people whose intention is to hurt you and/or your beautiful car. Be comforted. The tiny stamp of my license plate bolt will be sanded away, your Monroe-red paint job will be expertly re-touched and shined, and you will not even be able to tell we ever met.