Recently I tried to get a “real job.” Not that what I do right now isn’t work. But most of what I do is pro bono, gratis, charity– you know, housework. A too-good-to-be-true opportunity came my way, so I dropped everything summer and spent five hours updating my 20-year-old resume. I somehow managed to not look like an antique in my resume and landed an interview. That was where my dust started to show. Uh, a block of time? You want me to give you an available block of time? I thought this was a project gig. At some point my rambling and inability to commit got me the secret gong signal, and I was hastily ushered out. My reaction: a kamikaze plunge into self-pity and worthlessness, at which I declared to anyone who would listen, “I’m nothing more than a consumer!”
My sister, bless her wise heart, is witty and Godly and real. She had this to say:
Also, per your comment last night that you had a moment where you thought you were not contributing [to the world at-large]….each day you invest hours into your kids’ lives so that they will have the ability to navigate through the salt marsh that is our world. It may not feel like much… but trust me, your presence in Him [God] is doing more than you can ever imagine. Keep fighting the good fight. Your kids are worth the investment….as you know.
I wanted to share Heather’s words, as they speak straight to the daily challenge of impotence or unimportance that can creep over us parents like the tide. Each day… we invest into our kids, pouring into them what we think matters. Some days the fight is “good.” Some days it just feels like street fighting. But I’ll try to keep my presence in God, like she says, because He is the One who sustains me.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. – Phillippians 4:13